#EPICMOMFAIL

Do you ever plan something out...imagine how epic its going to be and how happy your family is going to be as result--only to have it go down in flames and NOT AT ALL what you thought.

Yeah, thats been me the past two weekends.  Had great plans for me and the kids only for one of them to ruin the entire evolution with their misbehavings.  SEVERE. MISBEHAVINGS.
Totally stinks.
And, to add insult to injury--I have family in town.  So they probably think I am a horrible mother who always loses her mind on her kids and acts like a tempermental butt head with them.

I'm not.
I swear I'm not.
I do love my kids and I am mostly patient with them all the time.  But sometimes they have this way of getting under my skin and I completely fly off the handle and lose it.

#EMBARASSING.

I feel like this means that I need to look inward and turn to my faith and the Word to get through this.  And I should.
But honestly, that seems like soo much work right now.  I know, I know.  Saying that out loud makes me a terrible person.  But I am a bit tired, stressed, its the holidays, I miss my husband and I am growing a baby from scratch.

Not an excuse.  Believe me I know.  I see these other moms who also have spouses who are deployed and they seem no where near as lunatic-ish as me on a day to day basis.  Whats their coping mechanism?  Whats their story?  What am I doing wrong?
Who knows.

Done with the rant.  And the whining.  Going to indulge in McD's and feel better.

Bones to pick...

Dear Hot Wheels Corporation,
If you were a person I would punch you in the face. Thanks to your flimsy and semi idiotic double sided tape the wall anchor for our wall tracks super awesome, life changing, had to have set fell off the wall sometime in the 6 hours I was out of the house today. Then, after corralling my clan to bedtime, I went like a total spaz to check on them again and make sure everyone was still breathing.
They were.
So I ever so NOT GINGERLY step on a DUMB WALL ANCHOR AND NEARLY BREAK MY NECK IN MY HALLWAY on the way back to my bedroom.
My wide foot and heavy ehh uhhhmm broke the wall anchor into pieces and I proceeded to say a slew of words that were conduct unbecoming a mom of 3.5 children.

So in closing Hot Wheels, get your self together and put some stronger tape in your wall tracks packaging.

Your truly,
The somewhat oblivious to random hallway debris, temper tantrum throwing lady with a permanent wall anchor indenture on the bottom of her right foot. Kaythanksbye.

.

Remember that

Moment when you actually realized your kids are growing up and there is not a damn thing you can do about it.

And you want them to be little again so you can just have all that time back...
Yeah that's where I'm at.
He's been doing this to her since he was 2 years old.
He just loves her.
Like a lot.
Like A LOT.
And she is so patient with him.

Much better older sister than I was at her age.
I was the variety of cruel older sibling who read aloud from the R.L. Stine books just to creep out my younger siblings.

Yeah, I know--mean and twisted. I see that now.

And she's not that way with him at all. It's soo inspiring.

Good night my sweet little loves.

How do I love thee...

Insomnia strikes again. Being pregnant rocks. Because I am not running a race in the morning and I don't have a 5 year old that needs to be at a soccer game shortly after sunrise.
Sigh.
It's okay, sleep is overrated.

Since I am awake, here is a cute picture of my baby snapped while his mother was making him put on the Halloween wigs while in Target today. Or yesterday. Whatever. Blogging at 3am is very confusing.
Either way, here he is.

So cute I could kiss his face off.
Oh wait, I do when no one is looking :)

That's my boy

Tonight my biggest dude prayed our nightly family prayer. The first thing he prayed
"Please keep all the people in VFA-41 safe and happy and healthy..."

He went on to specifically ask for the safety and happy heart for our dad In VFA-41. So sweet.

Just when I think nothing is getting through and his whole mission in life is to disobey and be loud--he comes through for me. That there is a kindness in his heart for others. He let's me know that something IS getting through his thick skull, in a good way.

Thank you Jesus. Because more often than not, I am questioning how many times a day I will repeat the same phrase to him before my head explodes.

Thank you oldest son, for renewing my faith that all my praying and mentoring and attempts to be patient are not in vain. You are a sweet boy with a good soul--and I needed to be reminded of that today. Love you.

Up to just a little bit...

Of indoor weed whacking with a crazy purple feather hat on...NBD.

Who is this guy? He's a silly goose. All the time. And I love him.

#stayfly

I feel like some people wake up and just look cool. And some people don't.
I am one of those that looks like the creature from the bottom of the swamp when they open their too small, crooked eyelids.

My kids however, are the opposite. It seems from the moment they wake up they are leaking #kidswag from their pores.

Must be nice. I work VERY HARD at attempting to look normal ;) and feel like I barely make the cut.

Example--this was early morning post run to the gym waiting for our stroller fitness class look my baby was rocking.

I'm jealous. Seriously.