That moment when you see something or someone from a waaayyy long ago past and you think….man, I am so glad I am not there anymore.
That just happened.
And for a long time I was sad or felt like I was missing out…I wasn't.
Always feeling like a "have not" and wanting to be a "have".
Then it hit me….what I have is awesome.
The family I have is awesome.
And the people who are dense enough to be my friends and put up with my incessant crying and emotions and twisted sense of humor, they are amazing.
I am a have.
I am so lucky.
And its funny, how I definitely don't want what I think I did.
I want the littles in my house to be kind and smart and gracious and level headed.
I want my Jet Pilot to learn and fly and learn more and defend and patriot-ize our lives.
I want to see the husband of my best friend come home from a long deployment and watch them run to each other and kiss and fall in love all over again in the span of .00056 seconds.
I want to plank til I faint.
I want healthy babies for the friends I know who are expecting.
I want love, and a lot of laughter. All. The. Time.
I want late night talks and wine and giggling with my sister in law who makes me feel young again, even though I think I mostly look like an old maid. (Thanks for that, four small people whom I grew from scratch)
I want to dance to Pandora when no one is watching. Or when everyone is watching.
Value what you have people, life is too short.
To that part of me that thought I was a have not--sister, you were so wrong.
I am a have.
In the best kind of way.